Closet Freaks and Tipdrills

After staying 8 days Matt finally agreed to letting me work for just two weeks instead of the usual three months.
Did baring and serving food during the days. on time off Tubaring was had, and night time was full of dancing, adjusting and consigiring.




So what im trying to say that it was the best job ever, and the people and most of the travelers were great.

Semuc Champey

In my three weeks in Lanquin, I made it to Semuc Champey three times. All three times = Amazing.
Natural limestone bridge that is about 300 meters wide with a river going under it. and above it are a series of pools of spectacular cleansing water.


People also jumped off a 12 meter bridge and we took giant swings into the river!


And getting spiritual....

I wish i had pictures of the caves we went into where you hold a candle as you swim through sweet and incredibly dangerous caves. some thing, like Pacaya, that would never be allowed in the states. I guess thats why Guatemala rules!

Election Day Riots

The whole month before the September 9th elections in Guatemala, houses, rocks, and streets had been painted in a variety of colors and signs representing one of the 20 or so probably corrupt political parties trying to get power on all levels of government.
Few people in Lanquin even cared about who was going to be president but were hopping to elect a new mayor, one who did not launder money, bribe other voters, or try to have the owner of El Retiro lynched. But this new guy lost, the incumbant mayor won, and at 3am, apparently about 6,000 people gathered int he town square and torched the municipal building, post office, and broke the windows of the bank.


Everyone's government papers, birth certificates and mail was burned and/or flew away with the breeze.
The streets were still and the people kept silent. an eerie and sad sight to see.

The Lanquin County Fair

on the way to Lanquin, a town in central Guatemala, and a great place to stay when visiting the pools of Semuc Champey, I hop on a bus and see Richard, Michiel, Esther, and Kerin. Sweet.
So we get to El Retiro Lodge, a lot of sweet cabins, on a river, with a great restaurant, bar, music store and sweet folks. First thing im thinking when i show up is, 'I'm tired of traveling and this looks like it would be a sweet place to work for the last three weeks of my trip.'

And even better, we showed up on the day of the annual rodeo and town fair. Now i've seen a few rodeos on tv before, but never live, so i was excited. and let me tell you something....I probably could have 'ridden' these cows just as well as most of the guys, who could barely make it out of the cage on the shocked, kicked and beaten cows.
...but it was cool seeing some dudes getting their ass kicked, an old man serenading us with cheesy ballads, and miss lanquin!
the fair was filled with tents for foosball, taco vendors, trying to get a coin on a plate for a Super Cola, and a ferris wheel operated manually.

all i gotta say is this...Chicken is Nice!

oh shit, and at midnight is was my birthday...word to 22!

Okay...Pacaya, the Active One

A one hour bus ride from Antigua, my group consisted of about 8 Israelis, 3 Spaniards, 2 other Americans, and a sweet guide.

oh here he is...

a 90 minute climb in the afternoon. and then a 10 minute climb down into the crater...

...screw this talking, lets see more photos...




...oh yea, i wanted to say..its really fuckin' that you sign no waivers regarding how dangerous this is and you are allowed to get as close to the lava as you'd like. probably a cool place to burn yourself to death if one feels so inclined.



and an added bonus was this surreal sunset!

Pacaya: The Active One...well a chicken bus story first

Sick of San Pedro's sleaze and excited that I could finally walk easily 23 days after the sting ray attack, I told everyone I was hanging out with that I needed out, especially since it was a perfect chance to climb Pacaya, an active volcano that lets you walk into a crater of extremely sharp, jagged black and silver volcanic rock with pockets of lava flowing around.

A hectic bus ride out of the lake valley leaving San Pedro left me in a bad mood. Knowing that the bus fare should be no more than 20 Quetzales, the dude tried to charge me 25. Now even though this is a difference of 75 cents, I still felt that this act was completely racist and un-called for. Even the old Mayan lady and dude next to me told me that they were paying 20 to go an hour further, all the way to Guate.
So I told the money collector off. He tried to kick me off the bus at an intersection at 4am, and then tried to tell me the cops were going to come on. But im not afraid of a frail 5 foot Guatemalan dude. So I got him where it hurt. Told Him that his actions were unjust and questioned, 'What would Jesus do?'
so he shut the fuck up and didnt bother me again.

oh...i forgot about the volcano

San Pedro Highlights (other than banan bread)

Other highlights of San Pedro la Laguna include meeting up with tons of buddies from various other places of this trip including Tommy, Dan, Amy, Richard, the Swiss Girls, the Dutch Girls, Michiel, Nur, Moti, Tilly, Ed, and most randomly Rosie.

this is what we call wasting the day away at ZooLa, a mostly israeli hangout with great atmosphere and even better food:

Chillin with Sil(ly Man) who can alway be found freaking out and dancing like crazy at Freedom Bar:

Going on crazy Tuk Tuk rides with Tilly and Steve up and down steep ass hills one didnt think were possible to climb in what to me appears to be pretty much a tiny motorized Razor Scooter with a cover:
We also have seeing some awesome blues band that Dan jamed out with on his soprano sax...they were really, really, really good:
While at a bar dancing to some drum and bass and watching a little local dude paint a mural inside the bar recreating what appeared to be a cartoon Godzilla/Rampage/Power Ranger scene a crazy lone hiker with a full on beard and green hiking backpack rolls in and starts having a conversation with the painter before getting his groove on with all his equipment and his propoganda t-shirt. this was probably the funniest thing i´ve seen yet.

and finally...the market in Chichicastenago, one of the best in all of

central america

¿Pan...Pan de Banano, Pan de Chocolate, Pan De Coco?

Okay, so i know i keep on going off about banana bread, but as soon as I got of the boat at San Pedro La Laguna, on Lake Atitlan in Guatemala, i was greeted by Juanita, the cutest little short mayan woman who was selling none other than Banana Bread! So immediately i pulled out 5 quetzals and got a loaf which was hearty and scrumptious but not the best.

Soon after and during the next week in this town filed with ex-pat hippies, cool bars and cheep food, i realized that there is a whole racket of banana, chocolate, and coconut bread sellers. they all look the same and they all hound you constantly. I havent gone 10 minutes without being asked if i wanted some kind of bread, even when im in a restaurant, bar, or hostel. I asked Juanita who was ¨Él Jefé¨ and she said that her sister and two others are the main cooks.

But the business runs like a mafia ring. If you dont sell enough or dont bring back enough money one´s salary gets cut by the lead Pimp of banana bread. Its a vicious trade.

street fair, real estate salesmen, and trance dance

After not being able to go to Semuc Chempey because of some floods, i decided to meet back up with Jenny and Angharod in Antigua. they werent digging the mild weather wich was a great relief for me so they left me to read in the beautiful Central Park of Antigua, probably the prettiest city i´ve seen so far in Central America--which makes up for the insane abundance of americans ´studying´ spanish.
in the process of reading Collapse (instead of Lolita, since a bunch of kids were running around, and i felt like it was somewhat creepy to read Lolita around kids) this House and Apartment salesman strikes up a conversation with me. and while his friendliness was somewhat creepy, it was great talking to someone in Spanish.
so we go off to a festival in the nearby town and he still is trying to sell me a house as a stare at bootleg CD salesman with the Rosie Odonell Jean Jacket!!!





...and somewhat creepy dude keeps on bumping into me telling me to stop by his office and check out his plans.
instead i went to a bar with a bunch of people whom i had initially met in Utila and wrecked the dance floor with my amazing trance dancing skills. i must give my electro dance skills credit to non other than Alex Toplansky who taught me some years ago to flip out when at lame ass clubs in Montreal.

the banana bread mission

So after aaron introduced me to the best banana bread in the world in Tortuguerro, Costa Rica...i have since been on the lookout for more amazing banana bread...Juanita here in San Pedro de Laguna in Guatemala greeted me with an offering of such bread--mistake was made, i didnt realize she had banana bread with chocolate...my fave!--but anyways, its pretty good, but so far the closest banana bread has come to that of the tortuguerro feast was not hat of Juanita or that used for the hikes in Tikal, but in Rio Dulce.
even this picture makes your mouth water...mmm so juicy and succulent, and went perfectly with a banana chocolate batido con leche (milk shake)

Copan vs. Tikal

Pretty much everyone i´ve met on my travels who have been to either the Tikal or Copan ruins have told me Tikal is better, if you go to it don´t bother with Copan. But what I learned from these cats is that they mostly lack any appreciation for decifering little differences in the ruins which show huge differences in the cultures and lives of these two city-states.
While Tikal seems to be one of the largest Mayan cities with towering temples and great views, all currently hidden in the jungle, and Copan was sold to some archeologists 150 years ago and is now a pretty park with sweet ruins of its own, Copan still holds this amazingness in the ways of its sculputre.

On 85- or so steps up a temple reads the history of the Copan city until the reign of 18 Rabbit. SICK!
And i thought the ball court was way cooler.

below is two pics from Copan...
the first is the depiction of the rain god...underneath is the ball court where essentially the most badass sport was played. apparently the winner was sacrificed...haha, fucking morons.


But then again walking around Tikal you can see that there are so many homes and temples covered in less than three inches of vegitation that have yet to be excavated making the experience pretty mind boggling. and i got some pretty sweet pictures in tikal and clibing those temples was scarry fun.

Sun Jam + Paradise = Heaven

greatest two days ever. i think any of the other 1,500 or 2,000 people on the little Key off the island of Utila would agree that although a rip off, Sun Jam was spectacular.
from noon to noon, 24 hours of techno, house, trance, whatever crappy repetitive electronica it is, blasted throughout this tiny island as all danced or looked like morons freaking out to the beat.
the clearest water with perfect reefs surrounded the island for a great refreshing dip to start off my afternoon followed by an endless night of jumping up and down along with flailing my arms erratically.
as an added bonus, all the street meat vendors from the down brought their ovens to the island.

oh yea, i almost forgot how i almost didnt make it to the festival. in order to get a boat ride for half the price (which ended up being free), i jumped on a boat with the hot dog vendor. about 8 of us squeezed on this tiny leaky boat and we all had to lean from side to side to prevent the boat from tipping due to the large wakes made by bigger and faster water cruisers. Luckily, we didnt capsize like happened to Ann-Marie, whom i've bumped into for the fifth time now on my trip.

Fire spinners, tons of lights, freaks, and great friends from all over the globe helped make the fest really memorable. Although it was supposed to go until noon, 9am saw the end of the festival, which in hindsigt was good because by 10:30 (while on the boat back to Utila) the downpour showed up again. At least it waited until Sun Jam ended. Good thing the after party continued at Coco Locos later that night with more trashy techno that i couldnt help but make cheesy dance moves to.

hopefully some pictures will eventually be found at http://www.sunjamutila.com/

The Los Zorros Sting Ray Attack

So Tina has this sweet place on the northern coast of nicaragua. About an hour walk from the northern tip of the coast.
I hopped on a bus with her and dennis and for three days we just hung out, had some Tonas and adjusted everyone's attitude.
It was a great tranquil break that i needed where i could just read, pee in a bodega, and go swimming...
until a Sting Ray flipped its tail through my foot!
so much pain, my whole leg was going numb. i've never had so much pain in my life. but luckily Tina la Gringa has an adopted Nica family that takes care of her and she takes care of them by teaching them english.

But shit, this Sting Ray really put my life into perspective. I know Steve Irwin was nailed in the chest, but i still thought to myself...what if i was to doe right now, in this tiny village at least 2 hours from the hearest hospital.
My hole take on life changed that afternoon as Arturo took a burning hot plantain to my foot and stopped my pain. A few cups of Flor De Cana also managed ot help a little as well.
i keep o nthining about what im going to do when i get back to the sates and am overwhelmed by options of jobs, careers, locations. i know in my life i can do it all, but i also know that it can end at any minute. So i guess i made the right descision to head to this awesome island in honduras and rave out for the next 24 hours.

For now, im glad i could give Tina and Dennis 20 gigs of music to make their night.

The Nica Straw

We all know that soda out of a glass bottle is amazing. BUt think of the sheer dissapointment that ensues when you order an ice cold Fanta and the lady pours it in a little plastic sandwich bag sticks a straw in it and ties it up.
Well that led me to this new business venture...A bar that serves all its drinks, beer, wine, mixed drinks, shots....all in a little plastic bag with a straw. It´ll be a little tast of Nica life in a bar, aptly named, The Nica Straw.
Booya! amazing idea.


In other news, got to hang out with some locals, under the name Alfonso de El Salvador, and go on a crazy adventure to illegally buy beer at 2am, while trying to ditch a cab driver who wasnt satisfied with the absurd amount of money he charged us to go to the make-shift beer joint in a gas station. I couldnt believe i got away from gringos for a night.


Time for an attitude adjustment. And off to the northern coast to hang at Tina la Ginga´s place.

The ballet in Leon turned out to be a series of 6 or so ballet segments including a 15 min Swan Lake (bringing me back to the horors of Marching Band when we performed it) and an interprative dance to bjork. I wish i could have captured some of these costumes in what appeared to be a middle school dance recital gone awry.

(on a related note, just because the crappy ballet was $1.50, aren´t i still allowed to say it sucked. I cant stand these guys who relate quality to price. True the value added flavor at La Playita was better before they raised priced the last time, butthe fact that i was criticised for giving an honest assesment of shitty expression of art pisses me off.)

and the opposite of shitty art...saw some amazing modern art from central america. too bad the security guards made me delete the photos.

Its also sad to see the lack of interest in art and culture in Nicaragua. Although its there, few people besides the artists choose to recognize it. Perhaps it is because they are too busy working 12 hour days making 2-3 dollars a day and barely feeding their families. But it would be great if I were not the only one in this amazing art museum. I just think that if the people begin to embrace art and other cultural activities, they will grow more as an educated nation and be able to more easily produce wealth for themselves. ( i know i am making some stereotypes, but i have a point)

and one more thing...
The two women selling food behind the cathedral were amazing. Always providing great dinners. My trip to Leon is dedicated to them.

Ceviche and Kebabs

Back in San Jose for one last stroll before heading up to Leon, Nicaragua.
Last time Aaron and i made a big mistake and grubed at this pizza joint not realizing that there was a Kebab/Gyros/Doner stand across the street. So a visit was necessary.
Analysis: Great meat, good quality veggies, but mediocre sauce, and flabby pita. Though not stale, the pita lacked a classic chewiness that compliments the roasted shawarma meat. Also i was dissapointed with the fact that like traditional Doners, this was not overflowing with ingredients. But hey, it was only two bucks.

Even better was a stop at the central market--three times in the past two days. Two of those times Aaron and I (and the second time we brought a german friend along) sat at the counter of a Ceviche stand. nestled in between much of the meat and fish sellers, these guys must be making the best fish and shrimp ceviche around. While heavy on the lime and light on the chilies, the fish was tender and juicy and there were perfect amounts onions, and cilantro to top it off. I recommend adding some hot sauce and making sure you get some fresh tortilla chips and plantains on the side. (grand total: 2.50 for fish, 3.25 for shrimp)

Banana Bread and Turtle Eggs

Tortuguerro is located on the northern Caribeban coast of Costa Rica.About an hour boat ride from the nearest road, this little village of about 1000 people is one of the biggest nesting sites for turtles inth e world. Now i will s top sounding like a Lonly Plantet guide book and tell you that seeing a 4 foot turtle plop out about a 1000 eggs in a hole on the beach is surreal. dissapointingly the guides seem to not be that well educated in the research done with sea turtles especially the Green Turtle whcih we saw. The two day trip also included Steiny and I renting a canoe, and spending 5 hours traversing the little rivers and canals seeing tons of birds, monkeys and even a baby Caiman.

but this was just all a supplement to Dorleans Bakery which had the best Banana Bread in the whole world. One doesnøt know what taste is until they carress little bits of banana bread with hidden chunks of bananas and peaches with their tounge. Oh man, one word: Glorious!

oh and the owner of the roach infested hostel was indeed a vato from oakland. well he certainly looked liked a really big Raiders fan. what a cool dude.

Another try in San Jose

My third time around int he past 6 weeks and this city is finally growing on me. I dont know if its aaron´s enthusiasm or drinking cacique on the street or seeing Malpais at Jazz Cafe...but i dig this dump. Ta Dauw!
In news in my head, ive been coming up with lesson plan ideas if i were ever to become a teacher...i really dig this idea.

The best casado turned bad

Remember when those new lays contained Olestra and everyone was scared? Well i think there might have been tons of olestra in my casado because i was going nuts for two days strait. And the saddest part is that i´ve never had better food from a bus station before in my life. I mean 3 bucks for rice, beans, chicken, plantains, tuna noodle salad, tortillas and a fresca??? undeniable...and in the end totally worth it.

Making another volcano my bitch

Climbed Volcan Madras on Isla de Omatepe in Nica. The bartender in granda said Largo Nicaragua was the 3rd largest in the world. Knowing she was wrong i later found out that its the 20th...so booya!
but anyways...we got our climbing on. sadly two of the scottish guys who came along had to turn back 1km and 2km into the anti climactic hike. sweet lake in the crater but no views...but climbing a volcano is still fun. and a big fat tona afterwards made it all worth while.

and hanging out on hammocks and reading COllapse all day is very relaxing.
at the second hostel, El Zopilote, this part farm makes fresh tahini and nutella, and the best chocolate liquor. the bread and pizza were also terribly amazing. too bad my back was killing me after the night´s sleep on the hammock.
but the views were incredible.
the only thing that killed the moment was Nacho, an angry spaniard that thinks all amaericans should get out of latin america even though it was his people that originally colonized central america. and he complained that turning up some amadou et miriam was ruining the vibe... so in conclusion nacho sucks and aaron and i peaced out of omatepe at 4:30 am to make it to san juan del sur.

notice: dont swim in largo nicaragua. we saw a guy pouring laftover insecticide in the lake.